The Daily Bloon

Title: Stealth
Genre (Movie): Action
Description: AI plane goes haywire and kills things and the US government is stupid. Plus, Jessica Beal.
Quickrating: 3/10

You know, this summer was a pretty good one for movies. There weren’t really that many godawful ones, if you think about it. And that brings me to Stealth. You know, I saw the previews for this movie. I thought, “Wow, this looks like an awful movie. I don’t think I want to see it.” Somewhere around the point where they say, “The lightning strike must’ve….rewired him somehow!” I kinda put the movie in the “pure shit” category in my head.

And yet, one thrilling afternoon, me and my friends go to Katy Mills and need to see a movie. Stealth was chosen on account of Jessica Beal, and the rest is history. That meaning that we watched the movie.

There’s no kind way to put this: this movie really does suck. The plot is trite and cliche, and yet manages to deviate from the basic lines you would expect to something even lamer; which is a feat hard to accomplish. Really, the only things that bring it up are the explosions, which are very nice, and the several minute-long Jessica Beal bikini scene. And if those two things are the only stuff bringing the movie’s value up, it really makes you wonder what goes on inbetween those things.

-”Woah. He’s downloaded songs from the internet…”
-”Which ones?”
-”All of them.”