This pretty much sums up my week, even though it’s only Tuesday.
Listen to Weird Al rap to Chamillionaire’s Ridin’ Dirty, in his own style, White and Nerdy.
Here is the song, from youtube.com. Thanks to the Houston Chronicle for helping me find out about this!!
Yarrr! Today be Talk Like A Pirate Day!! …So I can’t talk Pirate that well but go ahead, everyone else, start talking like our fellow IBloon does everyday now! 
“Save that last donut for me, unless ya care to feel the cold steel of my hook hand up yer arse, matey.”
Here is some useless information to hold your attention momentarily =)
An average beaver can cut down two hundred trees a year.
An average pig squeals at a range from 100 to 115 decibels.
An ear of corn averages 800 kernels in 16 rows.
Average calories burned daily by the sled dogs running in Alaska’s annual Iditarod race: 10,000.
Average length of a coat hanger when straightened: 44 inches.
Average number of eggs laid by the female American Oyster per year: 500 million. Usually only one oyster out of the bunch reaches maturity.
Average number of hummingbirds required to create the weight of 1 ounce: 18.
Average number of squirts from a cow’s udder needed to yield a gallon of milk : 345.
Cats average 16 hours of sleep a day, more than any other mammal.
Every square inch of the human body has an average of 32 million bacteria on it.
It takes a lobster approximately 7 years to grow to be one pound.
On average women say 7,000 words per day. Men manage just over 2000.
On average, 150 couples get married in Las Vegas each day.
On average, right-handed people live 9 years longer than their left-handed counterparts.
Smokers are likely to die on average six and a half years earlier than non-smokers.
The ashes of the average cremated person weigh 9 pounds.
The average adult raccoon weighs 21 pounds.
The average American spends 120 hours a month watching television, the equivalent of five complete days in front of the TV.
The average duration of sexual intercourse for humans is 2 minutes. (Ha)
The average lead pencil will draw a line 35 miles long or write approximately 50,000 English words.
The average person drinks about 16, 000 gallons of water in a lifetime.
The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.
The average person releases nearly a pint of intestinal gas by flatulence every day. Most is due to swallowed air. The rest is from fermentation of undigested food.
The average person walks the equivalent of twice around the world in a lifetime.
I feel really bad. I’ve been meaning to write this review ever since I saw the movie. The thing is, I kinda saw the movie 2 weeks ago (!). So I’m doing my best to recollect my impressions. Here we go.
Title: Little Miss Sunshine
Genre (Movie): Independent film (That should tell you enough, right?)
Description: A family that puts the ‘fun’ back in ‘dysfunctional’ goes on a massive road trip because they’re little girl has qualified for a beauty pageant. Hilarity ensues.
Quickrating: 9.5/10
At first, the only thing I knew about this movie was that Steve Carell was in it, and that it featured a VW bus. I saw a single ad for this while watching another movie, and it looked cool, but it quickly receded from my memory. Then one of my friends saw it by chance (he missed his showing of Snakes on a Plane) and relayed back to me that it was one of the best movies he’s ever seen. “Odd”, I thought to myself. “Perhaps it’s worth checking out?”
This, too, quickly became another dusty memory on my brain shelf.
Then, one night, I was at a theater with friends, and we had no idea what to see.
Well, no, that’s a lie. The girls wanted to see some generic clone of Save the Last Dance and every other dancing movie that’s ever been made. I, on the other hand, can smell certain types of pure shit from a mile away. I was trying to get them to change their minds to something, anything…
And my wandering eyes stumbled upon a showing of Little Miss Sunshine.
Thank Jesus.
If anyone is interested, our awesome IBloon, who recently left us to become a pirate, will be anchoring the ship in Hawaii tomorrow to spend a few days there before going to Western Samoa. Pretty sweet, huh?
I be jealous about the Hawaii part. And BloonBlade is definitely jealous that there are about 36 girls on the ship and only about 10 guys
